A woman in the birthmother support group I attend just linked us all to this blog post, hoping that some of us would feel moved to rebut one commenter in particular—a woman who speaks of her children’s birthparents with very little respect. Just what I needed to start my morning off right. She trots out the old favorite, Your birthmommy was “14 years old and was a drug addict,” explains that there’s no need to talk to adopted kids about birthparents because her own children aren’t interested, and then accuses other posters of attacking her and not welcoming other perspectives.
The woman who linked me in is both a birthmother and an adoptee, and I think she feels strongly that some adoption organizations tend to marginalize the birthparent perspective—maybe she’s right, but most days, I just can’t bring myself to be part of the solution. I’m not going to post on that blog entry, I’m more than likely never going to become a part of their conversation; I don’t think I belong there.