7 thoughts on “If You Ever Wondered

  1. Gosh I think the last time you asked this I was your first commenter also.
    I have a lot of questions for you, I always do, but I always think it’s inappropriate to ask them, that I’m being too nosy or something.
    I suppose my most burning question is: do you think you’ll ever not be sad about having placed Cricket?
    I ask because, and I hope you’re not offended by this, you (and Mr. Book) seem so sad about it, and that sadness seems so pervasive. Of all the adoption stories I know about/follow, yours strikes me as one where I feel it would be best for everyone if you could get Cricket back.
    The whole thing makes ME sad.

  2. I have to admit that I read because I love hearing about your relationship with Ruth and Nora. I am an adoptive mom of two girls and have open adoptions with both first families. I am always curious about what they (first families) are thinking, and I can never quite figure out how to ask them though. So hearing your perspective on their parenting, how communication works between you, pictures and letters, discussion about adoption, and all that stuff is so interesting. I just really don’t want to be a disappointment to them, but I know that my husband and I do things differently than they probably would have. So hearing your thoughts at least gives me some possibilities on what they could be thinking.

  3. What do you wish you Nora and Ruth had asked you before C’s birth? Is there anything anyone could have said to make you realize then what you know now, that placing him wasn’t the right decision for you and Mr. Book? Do you think if you had more contact during these first few years of his life you would have felt more comfortable with your decision? Do you wish the relinquishment laws were different so that you had more time to think about it? This one is out of left field and not really apropos because you are with Mr. Book, but do you think b-fathers/first-fathers should have more control over placement decisions? Or should is it a woman’s rights issue that expectant/placing moms should be able to make and control?

    thats a lot. thanks for asking.

  4. Thanks for opening this up to questions! I hope this isn’t too
    personal, but I’ve wondered how the adoption has affected your
    relationship with Mr. Book. Is there any resentment towards each other
    over the adoption?

    And a second question – You have written that your mother was firmly
    against the adoption. How did your dad and your sisters respond when
    you decided to place Cricket? What are their feelings now?

  5. You have written that Ruth and Nora are in the waiting pool again. I was curious if they are using the same agency? I am curious if the way the agency treated you and Mr. Book influenced their decision this go-round. If this is too personal I apologize.

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